So 4 weeks ago, I went through with chopping all my hair off and deciding to try to be a better me. I thought I knew what this entailed but it is going to be a much longer journey than I think I could have ever anticipated. This is a lifelong change that confirms to me that your life is a work in progress. Let’s look at the main things I’ve been working on.
I’ve done some writing, not my best work, but I overcame a fear and published it for the world to see, if anyone comes across it. I found the time, the energy and the motivation to do it. I think I could write a novel in the next few years, the kids will be a little less dependent, my littlest should start sleeping better (I pray for that to happen any day now) and I have a million ideas swirling around in my head, they just need to be worked on and fleshed out.
I know if I stuck with one idea and really worked at it, I could come up with something half decent, readable even. I have a goal of 100,000 words in mind. That first 1000 words took an evening, so 100 evenings should just about do it. That’s a simplistic way of putting it. I know it’s not as easy as that, if it was, I would be J K Rowling. Let’s be realistic, I doubt that I will ever be published, make money from writing or receive critical acclaim. But if I satisfy my own personal need to do this, that is more than adequate for me. Maybe I should aim higher, aim for the stars and all that. It could be fear of disappointment, it could be me being realistic. With all that said, I am still going to try because I am being a more positive me. And who knows, I might hit the jackpot and write something truly exceptional.
Oh and by the way, I am reading a Laini Taylor book in the picture, please check her out, she is amazing!
I feel like saying, the less said on this topic the better but in the interests of the blog I will admit that this has been my biggest failing. Overall this month, I have lost weight. Overall.
In between, my weight has gone way up and down but more up. I have given myself a little goal of not going above the weight I was (71 kilos) after I had my son. It’s a bit of a backwards step not aiming for a loss and hardly aspirational but it’s my birthday soon, both of my sons birthdays, three big Christmas dinners, the whole holiday season and a shed load of other reasons why this isn’t the right time. It’s so cliché to say that I will make a new start in the New Year, I’ve said that every year for years, so I won’t say it this time. Instead of putting it off that long, my plan is to wake up everyday and try my best to succeed at not eating that extra portion, eating more fruit, drinking more water, exercising and hopefully one day I’ll crack the code to a healthier life.
AND MY HAIR – STILL WOEFUL
I haven’t done an accurate length check but upon visual inspection my husband says I might have half an inch on parts of my head. I’m obsessed with the fact that on average people’s hair grows that much a month. I’ve always suspected that my hair probably grows a bit slower but even if it does, I feel that it is growing healthy. My hair feels soft and moisturised most of the time and the dryness only seems to creep in during the last few hours of my day. My kinks are just about back and although it will be slow, I’m feeling very positive about the end results.
If my hair grows 0.5 inches a month, to get to my goal of tailbone length which is about 24 inches, this will take 48 months or 4 years. That doesn’t take into account trims which I will need to keep my hair healthy, breakage that will happen no matter what I do and honestly, there may be times of neglect so if I add another year to the estimate, I’m looking at 5 years.
Thing is, I don’t think my hair is growing that fast, maybe I’m looking at more like 7-10 years. That is very scary. The tailbone length goal was just a challenge I set to push myself further, which I realise now is possibly a step too far. My actual goal length for life is bra strap length (BSL), I think this would be an easier length to maintain and is a length I have always enjoyed when wearing extensions. All being well, I might get to BSL in 5 years. Only time will tell but I’ve already learnt healthy habits and tips to get my hair healthy and happier. It would help if I ate better and exercised but they are pretty much the only things I am not doing that could improve my journey.
Things are going well, I feel more positive. I am actually doing things, I am trying to make less excuses but until there is no more sugar in the world, I’m going to struggle with my diet. I am writing a few times a week with my blog posts and I hope to continue with writing 1000 words of fiction regularly. My hair is an ongoing saga, I am learning so much and now going into month two, I want to take what I’ve learnt and use it on my kids, they deserve healthy hair too. I will just have to carry on looking at my hairspiration boards on Pinterest longingly, hoping to one day be one of those girls with super long, healthy hair. We will just keep going forward, what else can I do?
Let’s keep growing together!
xx Lee xx
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